Sunday, August 30, 2009

spanking doesnt solve anything

Spank out day.
I wrote a blog post about why we don't hit our children. So today is National Spank Out day and I encourage everyone if you do use cor pal punishment to stop just for today and think about other ways you can discipline your children without violence. If it works for today then why not do this everyday? I will admit I am a "former spanker", I had Jake when I was very young and I didn't know any better. I have not used spanking or hitting to discipline for several years. I have noticed a positive change in his attitude and behavior. I will admit there have been time when I have thought to myself "if I could just give him one good spanking he would do better". I know that was just because I was frustrated and over whelmed. If you have time today spread the word about spank out day! Small defenseless children to not deserve to be hit.

Ten Reasons for NOT Hitting Children

Physical punishment increases the
risk of child abuse. It is easy to hit too hard and cause injuries like bruises,
broken bones, welts, and nerve damage.

Physical punishment erodes trust between a parent and a child.

Physical punishment, when administered regularly, is related to a
worsening of behavior rather than an improvement in behavior. It increases
antisocial behavior such as lying, stealing, cheating, bullying, assaulting
siblings or peers, and lack of remorse for wrongdoing.

Hitting children transmits a pro-violence attitude. It teaches that it
is acceptable to hit persons who are smaller and weaker.

Fear is not an effective way of teaching appropriate behavior. Fear may
lead children to obey only when the person who hits them is nearby.

Children who are frequently hit often grow up with childhood memories
of anger and resentment.

Children are often hit for behavior which is not "bad" behavior but
rather behavior which is related to needs for attention, nutrition, sleep, and

Hitting a child for misbehavior means the caretaker loses an important
opportunity to teach a more appropriate behavior.

While hitting a child may stop a misbehavior for the moment, other
methods like time out, reasoning, talking, and implementing non-violent
consequences work as well or better and do not have the potential for harm that
hitting children does.

Better alternatives exist. Children learn best through teaching,
discussing, and observing adults who model responsible, caring and
self-disciplined behavior.

Ten Guidelines for Effective Discipline of Children

The goal of discipline is to teach children acceptable behavior.

Whenever possible, teach children what you want to see rather than punishing them.

View children's misbehavior as a mistake in judgment. It will be easier to think of ways to teach more acceptable behavior.

Never hit or shake infants. They do not know right and wrong. They do not misbehave on purpose. They need love and protection, not punishment.

Create a safe environment for children. Baby-proof the house.

Distract or remove infants and toddlers when they are doing something they shouldn't be doing.

Provide order and consistency. Whenever possible have regular times for meals, studying and bedtime.

Give toddlers and preschoolers age-appropriate choices and consequences.

Establish family rules that are appropriate for children's ages.

Keep them few in number with clear and reasonable consequences for not obeying.

Develop a trusting relationship with children by protecting them from harm, by being honest and trustworthy, and by exhibiting predictable and mature behavior.

Children need to hear more good things about themselves than bad things. Offer praise for appropriate behavior. Praise will increase that behavior.

Adopt a "no-hitting" attitude. No one has a right to hit anyone else in the household...that includes hitting children for misbehavior.


Nickel Pickle said...

Thank you, :)

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